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Rituals

Welcome to the Neighborhood

By January 14, 2016January 20th, 201635 Comments


When we first moved into our house twelve years ago, we were shocked by how friendly and welcoming our new neighbors were. We figured it would be like Brooklyn — we’d meet our fellow apartment dwellers eventually, after running into them enough times in the lobby’s mail station, or taking a minute to ask what kind of breed their dog was while riding the elevator. In our suburban hood, we soon found out, our new neighbors took a more active approach. Seth, down the street, showed up on our doorstep with his son and a basket of apples from the local farmer’s market. (Every Saturday from 9:00 to 12:00, he made sure we knew.) Lori, a mom of four (then ages 7 to 13) leaned over her fence when we were moving in the sofa and handed me a card with her cell phone on it (“Ask me anything, anytime,” she told me.) And Madeline, the mother of two middle schoolers across the street, knocked on the door with the most amazing thing: An index card, on which she had sketched the whole block, identifying which family lived in which house. She annotated with phone numbers, names and ages of kids, and little stars to indicate potential babysitters. I still have that index card, even though half of the information is no longer accurate. (Madeline’s house itself has turned over twice since then.) Apparently lives evolve just as quickly in the suburbs as they do in the city.

I was reminded of all this last month when I heard what my friend (and neighbor) Sue did for a few new families in her town. For starters she had a party to welcome them. If we are having a kindness contest, already, she has most of us beat there. But it’s the party favor that I feel the need to mention here on DALS — and what I think most of us might be able to handle: A bundle of local takeout menus tied up with a bow. (At least I’m picturing them tied up with a bow.)  Obviously, in the age of Seamless, anyone can access a list of local restaurant menus with a single click. But I love the idea of someone hand-picking her favorite spots for a newcomer, maybe even circling standout dishes, and in general reassuring a few urban ex-pats that decent pad thai does indeed exists outside the five boroughs of New York. (Don’t laugh: It’s a very legitimate concern.) How nice is that? What about you guys? What was the nicest thing you did for a new neighbor? Or that a new neighbor did for you?

35 Comments

  • Avatar Carol S-B says:

    When we moved into our house (25 years ago!) our across-the-street neighbor brought a frozen lasagne- straight into the oven it went! So kind, and a flexible meal to eat whenever we got hungry that day.
    Our neighborhood is quite stable: but when someone moves in, I always take some homemade goodies (cupcakes, homemade timbits). it’s a fine line between welcoming and stalkery! I always say hi. We have a good neighborhood.

  • Avatar Kat G says:

    A couple of months ago, I delivered homemade peach cobbler to my new neighbors. But what made the gesture extra nice is that I made sure to deliver it while it was still warm from the oven, AND I remembered the ice cream. Also, I didn’t eat any of it first, you guys.

  • Avatar jeannie says:

    I love these neighbor welcoming ideas, especially the personalized take out menus, and laughed out loud about the (legitimate) concern that one might not find a decent pad thai outside the 5 boroughs. Great post!

  • Avatar Barbara says:

    In my old apartment building, a couple moved into the apartment across the hall and the wife baked up a bunch of small chocolate cakes and brought them to her neighbors. I was stunned. This is New England. We’re grumpy. They were from Florida. That was over 10 years ago and even though, they’ve moved back to Florida, she’s still one of my best friends…

  • Avatar Taylor says:

    Love this post, and idea! We just moved and it has made me even more aware of how amazing our old neighborhood was! Our next door neighbor brought over homemade jam a few days after we moved in, and as time went on took the time to chat with us and invite us to activities in their home. It would have been easy for them to just be polite but not extend themselves, but instead we ended up celebrating birthdays, graduations, and even some holidays together. We were honored to help with the funeral of our neighbor’s mother, and share in many other highs and lows that life brings. This family has been a great example of what can happen when you go the extra mile- who knows what friendships are waiting to be discovered!

  • Avatar Coleman says:

    great post I’m a massive bingo fan from Sweden

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