One of the more fun parts of my “job” is that I have an excuse to reach out to people I’ve been secretly stalking for decades. Take that time, for instance, when I met Susan Spungen for breakfast at a Union Square coffee shop. Spungen spearheaded the food section at Martha Stewart Living twenty years ago. We have her to thank for leading the team that put together the Hors D’oeuvres Handbook, which is not only my finger food bible, but the bible of caterers across America. When I heard she was coming out with a book on Entertaining — What’s a Hostess to Do? — I set up a date, and over poached eggs and shaved asparagus, downloaded her hard-won wisdom.
21 Rules for Entertaining
Culled from What’s a Hostess to Do, by Susan Spungen (and so many thousands more where these came from)
1. Less can be more. Focus on a few beautiful well-conceived, well-prepared dishes.
2. Unless it’s the holiday, in which case the key word is “bounty.” (See above.)
3. The language you use for your invitation should focus on who you do want at the party (“Join us for a grown-up dinner”) not who you don’t want (“No kids please.”)
4. For the kids — When in doubt: “Bambini Pasta,” i.e. noodles, spaghetti, penne, whatever you got — with butter and Parm.
5. Some handy math: On average, assume your guests will have 2 drinks per hour (10 guests x 2 drinks x 2 hours = 40 drinks). There are approximately 5 wine glasses per bottle. A 1-liter bottle of liquor contains enough for 32 mixed drinks. One liter of mixer will make 8 drinks.
6. The Paloma is The New Margarita. [OK, disclaimer: Susan didn’t exactly say that, but I did, and will continue to all year. To make: 1/2 cup grapefruit soda (such as Mexican Jarritos or Jamaican Ting), the juice of half a lime, and 2 ounces tequila. Serve over ice with lime wedge.]
7. The Manhattan is the New Manhattan.
8. Centerpieces: DO use short candles, DON’T use tall or overly fragrant flowers or plants; DO decorate with short flowers or potted plants, DON’T crowd the table.
9. Scented candles? Yes, for sure, in the bathroom. On the table? Never.
10. All will be fine if Nutella is on the menu. Nutella Dessert Sandwiches: Toast thinly sliced brioche bread, spread with Nutella and dust with powdered sugar. Serve warm.
11. Three Four-Syllable Laws of Sanity Preservation when entertaining: Make it Ahead, Cook What You Know, Think Mise en Place.
12. A multitude of sins can be easily overlooked when people are basking in a warm glow: Lighting should be soft.
13. Bathroom checklist: Close the shower curtain, empty the trash. If there is no lock, make an “occupied” sign to hang on the knob. Better yet, have the kids do it.
14. Invest in a collapsible metal coatrack and never dive through a mountain of identical black wool overcoats heaped on a bed ever again.
15. Winning Cheese and Fruit Pairs for a Starter Spread: Apples + Cheddar, Quince Paste + Manchego, Figs + Gorgonzola
16. Good salumi needs little accompaniment. But no one will object if it’s next to some good bread, olives, and crisp fennel slices.
17. To make after-party cleanup less soul-crushing, always start the evening with an empty dishwasher, dish rack, trash can, and sink.
19. Yes, you can bring wine = The answer when your friends ask What Can I Bring?
20. A good party is much more than the sum of its parts. The gathering takes on a life of its own, and it almost always works out, even when it doesn’t.
21. The no-fail menu for entertaining kids and adults: Ribs, Slaw (lose the brussels in the summer), and make-ahead Ice Cream Sandwiches.
To make: For each sandwich, place a scoop of ice cream on a chocolate chip cookie (try Tate’s brand or another thin crisp cookie). Top with another cookie and press down gently. Place on a rimmed baking sheet and set in the freezer. Wrap individually after they’ve hardened, and freeze until ready to serve.
Art & Photo credits: Evan Sung (holiday spread) Sun Young Park (cocktail tray illustration), Susan Spungen (desserts)
LOVE it! I have to remind myself that less can be more. ALSO… my husband and I just discovered Palomas last fall. YUMMY!
sounds like a great book! would love to win it!
Start with an empty dishwasher. So logical, and yet never occurred to me. Thanks!
Great list and great looking book! I also never thought of the Bambini pasta, awesome idea!
Love all the ideas!
Soooo sage and sane!
This book sounds great!
mmm, I want to try the Paloma asap!
Great post, full of useful pointers. Getting ready to host a meeting of 18 people at my home in one hour, and #9 has me running to light my bathroom candles! Thanks for a great list (along with 100 Rules of Dinner–all time fave post).
Great tips! Makes me want to throw a party!
Love this! Would love to check out this book!
My mouth is watering looking at the spread in the top picture… yum! Great tips!
Great ideas! Definitely makes me want to entertain this summer.
Looks like a great book! Can’t wait to check it out!!
These tips are incredibly useful–they certainly inspire me to entertain more frequently. Can’t wait to check out the book.
This book looks like a great companion to DALS. Hubs & I are starting to have dinner parties for people we’re not related to, and last month I make the mistake of tall flowers on the table. We moved them before finishing our salads so everyone could see each other (blush… why didn’t I think of that?!!). That faux pas was forgotten when the pork shoulder with papardelle was presented. One guest had thirds! Thank you, Jenny!!
I love having people over for dinner, but I am a very anxious entertainer and tend to go overboard making sure things are perfect! Love the tips so far – would loove to read more from this book!
Great list! Love the Nutella sandwich idea! Off to add the book to my Amazon wish list. Just in case I don’t win…
We just moved into our first home together and I would like to plan a housewarming party- this book would be perfect for ideas!
Love the tips, this book looks great!
This is amazing. I can’t wait to make the warm nutella sandwiches and the ice cream sandwiches. Oh, looks like I’m having a dessert party.
I missed the part in the post about a commentator getting the book, but I did see “92 comments” – my first thought was – “was there something controversial in this I didn’t pick up on?” Wasn’t until I started reading the comments that I realized.
These are great tips, especially about the flowers – I’ve made that mistake as well.
I would love this book!
Oh! I just must win this for my neighbor and friend whose birthday is fast approaching…..She would adore this! Well, so would I. It would be tough to give away…..might have to go shopping right now!
Oh, I need this book! And that holiday spread by Evan Sung is absolutely to die for. Where did that photo originally appear? I want to use it as inspiration for all my future parties.